Innocent of true love
These are the people I like hugging and like being hugged by: my mum, my dad, my girlfriend, my nephews, my nieces, and, on very special occasions such as funerals and weddings, my siblings. Everybody else has to do with a firm handshake, or, if they're very close, a pat on the back.
But if Jack Mitchell, author of Hug Your Customers: Love the Results, had his way, then this list wouldn't be quite so short: for a start, it would include several hundred thousand FT readers. "Read the book, then give your customers a hug," recommends the blurb on the back of the paperback. "Give them a smile, ask them how their kids are. Just see if it works."
Mitchell's best-selling book highlights perhaps the most worrying management trend of them all: the emotionalising of business. No longer can we just like what we do, we have to be passionate. We can't just value our customers, we have to love and hug them. One would have thought the now famous video clip of Microsoft's Steve Ballmer leaping around in front of his staff, sweating heavily and whooping "I - LOVE - THIS - COMPANY" would have stopped such talk. But more and more companies are insisting on getting touchy-feely.
The other day I picked up a leaflet from fast-growing, award-winning UK drinks company Innocent, which contained the claim that they "were really quite emotional" about making their fruit drinks. "We love making drinks, we love drinking them and we especially love everyone who buys them. In fact you're unlikely to find a more passionate set of people than those that work at Fruit Towers."
The leaflet ended with an open invitation to its beloved customers: "If you're a bit bored you can give the banana phone a ring or e-mail us - we're always up for a chat. Maybe you can suggest a new recipe or just tell us about your holiday. If you're ever in the area, pop in. We'd really love to see you."
Reading this made me feel like I did when I was 10 and my alcoholic uncle would try to kiss me goodbye: I wanted to run away and scream. Why would I want to tell Innocent about my holiday? Why would they want to listen to my recipe ideas? Of course they wouldn't "really love" to see me at Fruit Towers: presumably they've got work to do.
Thinking this was the perfect opportunity to show how phoney claims of corporate love are, I decided to take up Innocent's invitation, beginning by putting in a call to the "banana phone" with a recipe idea. Inevitably, there would be an answering machine, inevitably, nobody would get back to me and, inevitably, I would have made my point.
In the event the phone rang twice before it was answered by a serious-sounding Englishman. I told him my recipe idea: a normal crushed fruit smoothie with banana, honey, milk and apricots but with an added twist: prunes. It would appeal to people with digestion trouble. And they could call it Smooth Moves. "Smooth Moves? I like it," he crooned back. "I'm just writing that down." A pen scribbled in the background. "Look, I don't work in product development myself, I'm on the sales side. And I'm not sure about prunes - I have a feeling that when blended, they won't look very nice. But I will look into it."
As I put the receiver down, in spite of myself, I found myself thinking: what a lovely man. He really seemed to like talking to me. But there was no way the company could survive the next test: an unannounced visit from an over-inquisitive customer to their offices in west London. I arrived early on a Tuesday morning and approached the first member of staff I saw, expecting to be turned back or asked to return at a more convenient time.
"Oh come on in," he replied, inviting me into the office without hesitation. "What's your name? Cool. Would you like a smoothie? Mangoes and passion fruits? Yeah? Cool. Cool. I'm one of the three founders who started the company five years ago. Row will show you around." Within thirty seconds Row had appeared, smiling broadly and talking rapidly in a Cumbrian accent. "Hi! Pleased to meet you," she said, looking genuinely pleased to meet me. "Can I show you around?"
There followed a 30-minute tour where she showed me every bit of the building, answered every inane question ("No, we don't hug each other") and explained that they got around 10 calls a day on the banana phone. "We get everything from people saying they like our drinks, to people complaining, to people just wanting a chat." So it's like the Samaritans line, but not as serious? "Yes, I mean, I have dealt with a few serious issues in my time, but it's great having that direct communication with customers - it just shows how much we love them."
To my surprise I left the Innocent offices feeling warm and fuzzy. As a customer, I felt valued. If I'm really honest, I felt more than that: I felt loved. Indeed, although I started this column by complaining that businesses were getting too touchy-feely, I have now changed my mind. If "loving" your customers and being "passionate" means being as generous and open as Innocent, then we all need more love.
I have changed my mind about Hug Your Customers too. Jack Mitchell, who runs a successful clothing business in Connecticut, isn't actually suggesting that we grab customers in our arms (though he does do this, occasionally). He uses hug as a metaphor for "exceeding customers' expectations", which may come in the form of carrying their shopping to their car, sending thank-you notes and even, on occasions, exchanging recipe ideas. In which case, as cringe-making as it is to say: I need more hugs. This column appears weekly. Lucy Kellaway is away until November
一个顾客的“爱”的体验
有些人我喜欢去拥抱，也乐意他们来拥抱我，他们是：我妈妈、我爸爸、我的女朋友、我的侄儿侄女。遇到特别的日子，比如葬礼和婚礼，和我的兄弟姐妹拥抱拥抱也无妨。至于其他人，只要用力握下手就可以了，如果关系亲密些，也只需拍拍后背。
不过，杰克?米切尔（Jack Mitchell）写了一本书，叫《拥抱你的顾客：喜获丰厚回报》（Hug Your Customers: Love the Results）。要是作者的说法成了气候，要拥抱的人可就不是我上面说的那几个人了：光是《金融时报》的读者就有几十万要我去拥抱。 “阅读此书，然后拥抱一下你的顾客。”书封底的广告上说：“向他们微笑，问问他们的孩子最近怎么样。你看这样是否行之有效。”
管理潮流五花八门，其中米切尔所写的这本畅销书所代表的潮流最让人担忧，那就是感情化管理。找这种感情化管理的说法，我们不能仅仅喜欢我们的工作而已，我们还得充满激情。我们不能仅仅重视客户而已，我们还得爱他们，拥抱他们。这不禁让人想起近来微软（Microsoft）流传出来的一段广为人知的录像：史蒂夫?巴尔默(Steve Ballmer)在员工面前蹦蹦跳跳，一身大汗，气喘吁吁地说：“我-爱-我们-公司”。看过这录像，大家估计都不会去考虑感情化管理一说了。但是，越来越多的公司却坚持要走煽情这条路。
不久前，我拿到“纯真年代”（Innocent）公司的一份推广册页。纯真年代是一家英国饮料公司，发展迅猛，而且获得一些奖项。该公司的推广册页上宣称，他们对水果饮料的生产“确实投入感情。”“我们热爱饮料生产，我们热爱品尝我们的饮料，我们特别热爱所有买这些饮料的人。事实上，在我们的水果大厦（Fruit Towers）以外，你很难找到更热情洋溢的人了。”
册页最后向公司所挚爱的顾客发出公开邀请：“如果您感到乏味，拜托打我们的电话，或者给我们发电子邮件，我们会一直乐意与您聊天。或许你可以提出新的饮料配制建议，或许和我们聊聊你的度假经历。如果你就住在本地，不妨抽空到我们公司来。我们很想与您见面。”
看到这些，我不禁想到一段往事：我十岁的时候，酗酒的叔叔每次想亲我时，我都想尖叫着跑开。我为什么要把我的度假经历告诉给纯真年代呢？他们怎么可能会倾听我的饮料配置建议？当然了，他们不会真的“很想”在水果大厦见到我吧：他们手头估计都有活干吧？
不过我想这也是个绝佳的机会，可以帮我戳穿所谓的企业关爱是何等矫情。所以，我打算接受纯真年代邀请。一开始，我打电话给所谓的“香蕉电话”，告诉他们我有个配制饮料的建议。接电话的肯定是留言机。肯定没有人回我的电话。我的观点肯定会得到验证。
不过，电话铃响两遍后，还真有人接听了，是个语气严肃的英格兰男人。我将我的饮料配制法说了出来：平常所见的水果奶昔，里面有香蕉、蜂蜜、牛奶、杏子，但我另加了一道口味：放点梅干在里面。我说这饮料会吸引消化不佳的人。如果要取个名字的话，不妨称之为：一帆风顺。“一帆风顺？我喜欢这名字。”那人低声说，“我这就给记下来。”我听到电话后面有写字的沙沙声。“是这样啊，我本人不在产品开发部，我是销售这边的。还有，我不知道加梅干行不行，我觉得如果搅拌起来，梅干就不怎么好看了。不过我会研究一下。”
放下电话，我情不自禁地想：多可爱的一个男子！他看来还真是喜欢和我讲话呢。不过接下来的考验这公司无论如何是通过不了的啦：我要当一回过度好奇的顾客，事先不打招呼，就到伦敦西区走一趟，上他们的办公室去。我找了个星期二上午，早早地赶了过去，找到我所见到的第一个员工。我估计他会对我一口回绝，或者请我在更方便的时候来。
“哦，请进请进，”他回答道，毫不迟疑地把我请进了办公室。“请问尊姓？很棒。要不要来点果昔？芒果和西番莲果果昔？行？很棒。很棒。我是公司三位创办人之一，我们五年前开的这家公司。让露（Row）带你参观参观吧。”不到三十秒，露就出现了，满脸微笑，说话速度很快，带着坎伯兰口音（Cumbrian accent，英国西北部）。“您好！很高兴见到您。”她说，看那表情，是真心高兴见到我，“我能否带您参观参观？”
接下来的三十分钟，她带我参观了大厦里的各个地方，对我提出的空洞问题也一 一作答（“不，我们不互相拥抱”）。她还说，他们每天能接到10来个香蕉电话。“内容不一，有的是说喜欢我们的饮品，有的是向我们投诉，有的只是想和我们聊天。”这么说，你们就像圣经里说的好撒马利亚人，这电话是帮助热线了？不过能否真帮到点子上呢？“会的，我想说，在我值班的时候，还真处理了一些比较严肃的问题。能和顾客直接沟通很不错，这说明我们多么爱他们。”
让我吃惊的是，当我离开纯真年代办公楼的时候，我还真是感到温暖而舒心。作为顾客，我确实感到受到了重视。要我说真话，我还真是不止是受到重视，我感到他们真的爱我。在本专栏文章一开始，我还抱怨企业过于煽情，我现在的想法变了。如果“爱”你的顾客，“充满激情”意味着像纯真年代那样大方和开明，那我们确实需要更多的爱。
我对《拥抱你的顾客》一书看法也变了。杰克?米切尔本人在康涅狄格州经营一家很成功的服装企业。他在书里的意思，并不是真要我们把顾客一把揽到怀中来拥抱。他说的拥抱是个比喻，是让我们“超出客户期望”。超出客户期望的形式很多，比如帮客户把他们买的东西送到车上，发送感谢卡，甚至偶尔还可以交换交换菜谱。按照这种理解，我要说：我需要更多拥抱，哪怕这样说起来有些肉麻。
